Дата публикации: 2017-10-11 13:05
For her sake, I wouldn’t want him to say, “I’m going to romantically pursue you in the hopes that one day I will be physically attracted to you.”
Maybe because I have been married for fifteen years, but this question of purity feels like common sense. One of the things I say at The Village, on repeat, is that nothing good has ever come from a boyfriend and girlfriend cuddling on the couch watching a movie from 66pm to 6am. It has never ended in a discussion about cinematography in the history of watching movies on couches. To put yourself in that position to begin with is a foolish one.
And I think that’s such a terrible response, because the desire to get married is a good desire. It may even be a desire woven into them by the Creator of the universe. If the Bible says, “He who finds a wife finds a good thing” (Proverbs 68:77), that’s all I need to affirm a desire for marriage in men and women.
This is an extremely complex question that is hard to answer outside of actually knowing the people involved. My knee-jerk reaction is: No, you are not ready. Let’s get this handled. But I think I would want to know more about what’s going on. Where is mortification happening? Where is vivication happening?
Courts have sometimes viewed all passwords as equal, faulting a victim whose partner hacked her Facebook because she had shared an Amazon password with him. The court questioned whether one password could be considered private, given that she had shared other accounts, Rucker explained. “If you share an iCloud account and you’re sharing pictures that way, you’re sharing accounts in the eyes of the court,” Rucker said.
Abusive spouses have been known to surveil their partners’ online activity. While spouseware –malware that sneakily harvests geolocation, texts, calls, and other information—is an issue, Rucker notes that abusive partners might also track what their significant other is doing on a shared home Wi-Fi network. Using a VPN at home can help keep browsing data private.
We will be measured both personally and professionally by our dedication to providing each and every one of our clients with the best matchmaking service possible!
So, in all of this, the way I have tried to counsel our singles at The Village Church is to give themselves over to ministry and to serving the Lord.
To help find the right questions, we called on three not-yet-married friends who gave some time to thinking about the challenges faced by singles: Lore Ferguson, Paul Maxwell, and the recently engaged Marshall Segal. We ended up with these questions:
In the first part of Mingling , I really address attraction as a good thing, but not at the level to where our culture has put it. Gravity always wins. We are all wrinkling. Our nose and ears never quit growing. It is only a matter of time till that little component that we are basing so much on starts to vanish and must be replaced by attraction founded on character and covenant.